II. FROM
HEIR TO
EPIPHANY
The Regnum of Mad Potus George III-(II)
[from "The Rise and Fall of the Usanian Empire," VOL. 1, XXII ed.]

by Max Singer

While Mad Potus George III-(II) was of noble birth, the son of The Potus Pater George II-(I) the Purger, there was little in his early years to suggest the central role he was to play in the history of the Empire^.(1)

His most distinguishing characteristic was the possession, in a rather extreme form, of an inherited family trait, the Affectation of Country Simplicity–a chameleon-like protective mechanism common amongst the Higher Classes, whereby (or so they believe) they may blend into the background, rendering themselves, as well as the extent of their power and privilege, invisible, safe from the easily aroused and much feared resentments of the Perpetual Underclass.

The delicate mental balancing act between Reality and Appearance required to maintain such a stance (the source of many of the neurasthenic eccentricities endemic amongst members of that class) became somewhat more problematic–pathological, dare we suggest?–for the future Potus, when his father moved the family West, to one of the rapidly growing Frontier Provinces.

There, while ostensibly seeking his own fortune amongst the “Rough And Ready Wildcatters,” he served in the capacity of a “Mole,” looking out for the interests of the “Eastern Establishment” who felt their grip on power somewhat threatened by the Nouveau Riche Of The Prairie.

It was from that point on that the energy expended by the future Potus Mad George III-(II) to maintain that Affected Country Simplicity began to drain his mental resources.

Having to divide his time, as well as his formative experiences, between the Cosseted Isolation of the Eastern Lyceums (where he and the other offspring of the elite were prepped for power) and the rather more Primitive New Provinces (whose Yahooism modeled for the norm rather than the exception), Young George III-(II) went from being simple to being a simpleton, from a rustic to a rube – at times prone to outbursts of out-and-out silliness, at other moments to demonstrations of sheer idiocy.

Thus, pushed to take the first steps towards the Madness that was later to engulf him, he spent most of his youth and early manhood adrift on a “Gentleman’s Sea.”

He survived, nay prospered, upon the Favors, Sops, Points, Percentages, Payoffs, Bribes and other Such Quantifiable Signs Of Appreciation that are invariably attendant upon the ne’er-do-well offspring of “Important Personages”–the glow of the Promise of Reciprocity attracting a variety of Entrepreneurs, Lobbyists, Hangers-on, Conmen, Swindlers and the various other pests that habitually infect the body politic.

The chits for some of his more dubious business ventures were readily assumed by “Certain Parties” (a connection that one day would come to haunt him) and he was handed a share in the Games where he was regularly seen in attendance as Public Greeter And Interlocutor.

It was in that role that those “Certain Parties” began to see an inkling of the possibilities inherent in His Glad-handing Anomie, and, though such shallow talents may have been scoffed at as a flimsy foundation upon which to build a Public Career, let alone a Dynasty, one need only be reminded of the central role the Circuses had played in the rise of earlier Empires.

Even so, given Young George III-(II)’s rather Laissez-faire attitude towards his Public Persona and his seeming lack of ambition in that realm, any Contemporary Observer, without the benefit of hindsight, might have felt quite justified in the opinion that George was not destined to leave in his swath any of those “Lasting Impressions Upon History” (fruitful or deleterious) that others born to similar privelege, but also possessed of drive and gravitas, might.

But then his life changed drastically.

The “Defining Event” occurred:

Like Constantine on the Road to Damascus, he had a Religious Epiphany, a Rebirth–which, his opponents were wont to say, if genuine, was ample proof of the Absence of a Prime Mover rather than the Presence.

But whether his experience was
• genuine an early symptom of his madness
• a cynically devised strategem,
or merely, as was rumored…
• the result of having the law laid down to him by his Consort, the Lady Laura, and his Mother, the Formidable Flotus, Mater Barbara the Enforcer (anent his dissolution and profligacy)
his change in behavior was apparent to all.

He became a Staunch Advocate as well as Practitioner of all the “Usual Public Declarations Of Piety”–the Loud Ones (Alleluias, Amens, “Praise-be’s”), the Quiet Ones (The Barely Audible Crumbling Of A Crisp Banknote Or Check As The Collection Plate Approaches), as well as the Somewhat More Emphatic Ones (Biblethumping, Competitive Sobriety, Early Risings and Ejaculations of Sighs of Compassion for the Less Fortunate)–which sublime expressions, of course, are always a sign of “He Who is Graced By The Almighty.”

The net result being a steady increase in his attractiveness [read: usefulness] to the Rectus Religiosos, as well as those “Certain Parties,” both of whom were seeking a prospective Champion to represent them in the upcoming Contest of Sucession Ritual.

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1. Some historians who specialize in his early years point to references in the texts to his being an “Animal of the Party” as an allusion to latent factionalism. Such readings remain in disrepute as there exist precious other evidence of such early inclinations.